For a Nephew I've Yet to Meet....
While on the ferry to Manhattan, I browsed into my Facebook profile on my celfone, and curiously read a status update from one of my friends about what she wants to share online these days. She mentioned about "Kyle," who has turned grade 2 in school now, and has remarked about how time flies so fleetingly fast, without us even becoming aware of it. The bright upbeat of this day, and the breezy wind plus the movement of the waves against the ferry have got my mind into pondering. How could it be that I've not met this "Kyle" up to now that he's most probably 9 years old as indicated by his Mom's message? Then it dawned on me in a bright sparkle of a thought that he's actually my nephew, as I got myself reminded of this fact, he being the son of one of my brothers, in a former relationship. I think I can not take it against my friend, just like most Moms, if she would be always championing for her son, Kyle, who I just said happens to be my nephew.
I think Kyle remains to be a reminder to me of the father that I would never be. At age 43, it's simply death wish to desire to still have children (or even just a child) if I can't be a good father to them. And I'll just be too old with not much of my former youthful energy if a child is provided me in my old age----I would certainly be physically taxed by the demands of even playing with small children. (But God, in the presence of his holy Spirit, thru Christ, may have other plans; we never really know for sure!). I don't want to be adopting nor doing a foster parent act, as my heart's not really into it. But I can help in my own little ways, even by saying prayers for each child born into this world (including aborted ones!).
I am not entitled to voice out my opinions nor advice to parents as I'm not a parent myself. It's just like unmarried clergy members advising married people or those with children--they don't really know any better. I think parents know better how to best rear their children, given everyday challenges including ultra nosy relatives who have good intentions for them, though there are always difficulties when the issue of rearing children come into fore. They just need a pat in the back, every now and then, for the wonderful work they've been doing, or not doing at all (in some cases). Do I even have the right to venture into voicing out exactly what I got in mind when it comes to the personal lives of my siblings who have troubles or may have problems or issues with their past relationships, or even their current relationships? I think I have my hands full as I am now, with the troubles and hardships I have nowadays. I doubt if I can even help others if I'm not even able to help myself first (as "charity begins at home"). Problems, I've always believed, no matter how utterly annoying they can be, are magnificent blessings in disguise, and they're designed to help us grow and develop into the person God has always meant for each one of us, according to His purposes (and nobody else', even our most loving parents, and those persons in positions of power and authority who may have schemes in mind other than God's purposes).
Kyle, I remember, must have been brought to our late Father, by my brother or by my friend once or twice when the chance came (perhaps when the relationship was still not awry). I remember hearing it from my late Father that he got to see Kyle one time; he sounded proud and happy to have seen him. There are still no other opportunities in sight so that we can connect with Kyle, one way or another. Should we way "it's complicated" (as Friendster has pioneered on labeling status this way online)? One time, in the future, I'll get to meet Kyle. I hope and pray he won't take it against me why we have not seen each other while he was growing up......and as an afterthought for the most effective performance of my role as an Uncle that I am now in relation with him to even take place. For now, I remain grateful we're all still very much alive.
I think Kyle remains to be a reminder to me of the father that I would never be. At age 43, it's simply death wish to desire to still have children (or even just a child) if I can't be a good father to them. And I'll just be too old with not much of my former youthful energy if a child is provided me in my old age----I would certainly be physically taxed by the demands of even playing with small children. (But God, in the presence of his holy Spirit, thru Christ, may have other plans; we never really know for sure!). I don't want to be adopting nor doing a foster parent act, as my heart's not really into it. But I can help in my own little ways, even by saying prayers for each child born into this world (including aborted ones!).
I am not entitled to voice out my opinions nor advice to parents as I'm not a parent myself. It's just like unmarried clergy members advising married people or those with children--they don't really know any better. I think parents know better how to best rear their children, given everyday challenges including ultra nosy relatives who have good intentions for them, though there are always difficulties when the issue of rearing children come into fore. They just need a pat in the back, every now and then, for the wonderful work they've been doing, or not doing at all (in some cases). Do I even have the right to venture into voicing out exactly what I got in mind when it comes to the personal lives of my siblings who have troubles or may have problems or issues with their past relationships, or even their current relationships? I think I have my hands full as I am now, with the troubles and hardships I have nowadays. I doubt if I can even help others if I'm not even able to help myself first (as "charity begins at home"). Problems, I've always believed, no matter how utterly annoying they can be, are magnificent blessings in disguise, and they're designed to help us grow and develop into the person God has always meant for each one of us, according to His purposes (and nobody else', even our most loving parents, and those persons in positions of power and authority who may have schemes in mind other than God's purposes).
Kyle, I remember, must have been brought to our late Father, by my brother or by my friend once or twice when the chance came (perhaps when the relationship was still not awry). I remember hearing it from my late Father that he got to see Kyle one time; he sounded proud and happy to have seen him. There are still no other opportunities in sight so that we can connect with Kyle, one way or another. Should we way "it's complicated" (as Friendster has pioneered on labeling status this way online)? One time, in the future, I'll get to meet Kyle. I hope and pray he won't take it against me why we have not seen each other while he was growing up......and as an afterthought for the most effective performance of my role as an Uncle that I am now in relation with him to even take place. For now, I remain grateful we're all still very much alive.
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